Day 8- "Silent"

I think every mother knows that if you had known that it was the last time you would experience such a sweet silence you would have made it last longer.  I don't think I would have wanted to know, but there are days I would just love to make them small and and hold them so close again.  They are my heart and soul.

Day 7- "Life's Work..."

I was one of the few who yesterday advocated for going to school in cold temps as long as we had heat, because our kids were better off there since they would get two meals, and be safe and warm.  Well...we went.  And they got two meals, one served rapidly.  Why?  Because we were one of four schools in the county with no heat.  I can live with that error, even if they knew before our start time.  What is not ok is that our kids were there until 12:15 and we weren't told until 11:45 that is when it would happen.  IT. WAS. COLD.  Our students and teachers persevered and smiled and kept the best attitudes they could.  I watched a teacher walking a class down the hall ask if we had a coat that would fit one of her students, and that student had a coat before she got to her destination.  I question why it took that many hours- that wasn't fair to students or teachers, and falls on central office.  The kids were safe, and we did our best...not quite as planned but people in the building were part of the solution, not part of the problem. Behind the scenes people scurried to move materials and alter lessons so that students could keep going; everyone engaged in "other duties as assigned.  People kept a sense of humor.   As a teacher, this is our life's work...we do it all for our kids, on good days and hard days, planned and unplanned, whatever it takes.  

I have my other life's work though...my family.  Today, cold temps below zero or not, was a chemo day for my stepson.  Had there been no school that is where I would have gone.  His life literally depended on him going out in this weather, and we are grateful he has a hospital that is so phenomenal for his treatment.  

Then, there is my son- he came down in purple today, rare as a Redskins fan, a lone Ravens jersey I got on clearance a while back, and explained to me that his friend had asked them to wear purple today because his cousin had died, and it was in her honor.  I shortly found out that she was an Urbana student with a brother at UHS.  You can read more about her here:  http://www.keeneybasford.com/sitemaker/sites/KEENEY1/obit.cgi?page=services&user_id=1209643.


I realize more than ever how lucky we were today that our biggest problem was no heat and limited electricity- every one of our students made it home safely, and Liz's family would give anything for her to come home tonight.  My stepson got treatment he needed, and Liz's family would give anything to have had that opportunity to find something to save her life.  My life's work is far from over, and changing every day.  I am just so very proud to be a part of the team I am part of at work, and a part of this family we have grown.  We can't be 100% all of the time, but we can give 100% to what we are working with.  The compassion I saw today all around is humbling to say the least.

“You can't help respecting anybody who can spell TUESDAY, even if he doesn't spell it right; but spelling isn't everything. There are days when spelling Tuesday simply doesn't count.” - Winnie the Pooh

Frost- Day 6

Timely topic in the mid-Atlantic: FROST.  Tomorrow they are calling for wind chill 15-25 degrees below zero; in my 45 years here that has never happened that I remember.  All of a sudden regular old 34 degree frosty mornings don't look so bad anymore!  To go to school or not?  Some systems have cancelled, some are saying they are open regardless, others are holding TBD in the morning.  Schools in the area have already closed for 2" of snow this year, melted by 10:30 a.m. and everyone out holiday shopping by 11. Twice that a 2-hour delay would have sufficed. Now people are up in arms that we are going in negative weather.  It is January 6 and we will have used all of our "weather emergency" days by tomorrow...and you know what I want to say to these people?  Be grateful you have a good educational system with teachers who will be there ready to greet your children.  Be grateful if you are on social media because it probably means you can read, write, and that you have electricity and money for a device...which probably means you also have a home.  Most likely you are writing this as you prepare or eat dinner of your choice, and if you do get a freebie day off tomorrow you will be snuggled warm in your pjs watching tv, reading, or doing whatever it is you like to do. Many will probably even be out and about.  You won't be lined up for food somewhere, or hoping there is a room at the shelter and being told no.  Yes, it will suck to go out in that weather, but I bet everyone complaining has their choice of warm clothing and the option to drive kids to school so they don't have to walk or wait at the bus stop; many probably have the option to just take the day off and keep the kids home.  So, at the risk of sounding preachy, because I know I am being so, take a moment to think about what you have, because I work in a school that is 72% FARMS and I can't say I believe those kids aren't better off in school where there is heat, breakfast, lunch, and teachers who care (& please don't make negative comments about their situation, they didn't put themselves there). Their parents don't have to worry about feeding them with food they don't have or figuring out who will stay with them, and I can tell you often that answer is no one, it is "lock the door until I get home."  I know they don't all have coats, gloves and hats, and if there is one reason I don't want there to be school that is why, because they will have to wait for the bus.   Be grateful if you have a car to scrape frost off of, and a working defroster to help you; you don't have to wait at a bus stop to get to a minimal wage job because your family depends on you. I promise you that a day will come that you will wish your biggest problem was horrific wind chill.  I love a day off no less than everyone else, but sometimes you just need to dress warm, suck it up, and smile sunshine to all those around you.  Wishing you peace, love and somewhere warm to spend the day tomorrow!

Photo from bing images.

Take Flight!

Diagnosis heard

Leukemia was a shock

Need a new flight plan

We are a blended family who took flight in June of 2009.  To say that our six shared children integrated to become a family far more easily than we ever thought could happen is an understatement.  We took our time, and choreographed situations so they could get to know each other on their terms with shared experiences.  In January of 2013 we were thrown when we found out the second oldest, his son and a college freshman, had leukemia.  The other 5 kids selflessly made the accommodations needed to allow his father to be with him as much as possible, and to do what we had to in order to include their "brother from another mother" and meet his needs.  For better or worse, being with "him" has been the best flight ever, with some turbulence, and yes it came with baggage, I just had the power to choose what I took at baggage claim, and I can say that I got all of the gifts he brought that day and let the rest sit on that carousel.

Time and New Habits

I will catch up here on days three and four together, first up, "time."  Here is where I will mention "him."  Time with him is my serenity; he makes me laugh, he irritates me, he talks with me, but most of all the time spent with him I find myself full of contentment.  He spends hours with me in "the green chair," watching tv/movies, reading, laughing.  I used to think content sounded like settling, like good enough.  I know now that true contentment is something so deep down and that few are probably lucky enough to find, it is the gift of being in the moment in the very place that I am.  Satisfied.  Not needing more.  Planning for the future, but not at the expense of that day.  Having the privilege of falling asleep with him every single night, a precious time of day I look forward to every night. Time is what you make of it, and that can be a powerful tool when you exercise it.  Time is where you can find your serenity (note picture below, you too can budget and plan so you have time to lay here and watch the sun set with your serenity).

It does lead into day four's "new habits" theme.  My daughter working through the application to colleges process is forcing me to establish new habits, of saving, of learning the ins and outs of colleges, of looking ahead at my financial future.  I've been successful the past years at moving money into an account for college, but I recently realized that, "I've been teaching twenty years!" also means "I've been teaching twenty years and can retire in ten, at which point all kids will be out of high school, and we can look at options to move and try something new!" Looking at colleges has opened my mind to new geographical areas.  I've been grounded here, no lie- I live 25 mins. from my sister and parents, 45 from my brother, lived at home in college and haven't ever made a bold move like moving to a new city hundreds of miles away.  But we are talking about it...a new habit that these realizations has brought us to- talking about a future beyond being parents, making lunches, getting to sports games...starting that map that is going to keep us in our serenity, together...and discussing what we habits we have to include to get us there (Note: Online shopping, because I despise stores, is greatly impeding this habit, so another new habit is going to be limit that, maybe every purchase I DON"T make but want the money goes into a savings sub-account for that move!).

Something New...

Write ALM...Day 2...let's revert back to January 2 for this one..."something new"...starting with a quote from Frank Lloyd Wright: "Think simple" as my old master used to say -meaning reduce the whole of its parts into the simplest terms, getting back to first principles." This is the way I have been thinking lately, and my quest this year is to set myself up for something new.  I have made some steps to hopefully lead to a career shift,  not a full change, just a shift, but one that will take me back to the simple things in life I hold dearest to my heart and beliefs, and that will hopefully allow me to go back to why I started teaching in the first place.  I've got to get back to passion in my work, and while it isn't gone, it isn't 100%, and that is just not good enough.  I literally broke it down into my mind as to what my passions are, and from there began taking positive steps to turn that into my career.  Scary? Absolutely.  Excited?  Beyond words.  Biggest challenge?  Finding someone who believes in me the way I believe in myself, as shifting within the politics of school systems isn't easy.  If it all comes together then by August my something new will be challenging me to use my passions every single day, and I cannot ask for more than that.

photo from Google Images

In the beginning...

Write ALM January Prompt a Day

I saw this by clicking through what was probably one too many Pinterest links this morning, and have been wanting to do one of these with photos or writing or thoughts or whatever; I liked her list so here I go!  Not sure if I am doing it write, but hey, it is a new beginning for me so go with it, guide me, and laugh with me.

Today is January 5, and not one to slack I am going to backtrack a few days...I hope if you have thoughts you will comment and share, this is my first bold attempt at something so public...thus, I am making this my "in the beginning" post.  In the beginning I used myspace to connect to people after my recent divorce, and honestly, it gave me something to do with my time.  Admittedly it wasn't the healthiest use of my time on many levels, because I quickly saw that some "friends" used it as a weapon.  I gradually shifted to Facebook, mostly because that is what everyone else was doing; what was interesting is my parents started realizing that if they joined Facebook they would be more in touch with our everyday lives- mine, my daughter's, even their relatives in NC.  While many have gone to Twitter and Vine I have stayed with Facebook because I feel like I have coffee or happy hour every day with my cousins, aunts, siblings, and close friends.  My co-workers and I also get to know each other on a more personal level and it has helped relationships at work.  Pinterest came along and it was the younger teachers who got me on, and now I love it; in the beginning it was finding ideas here and there, now it is a method of organization for me; it is a way to plan parties and collect ideas, to remember which books I have read and liked.  Then.came.blogging.  I made a few posts, you will see them here, but I was afraid people might think it was arrogant, as in why would she think we care what she did/thinks?  I kept it pretty private (that is what blogs are for, right?), the antithesis of what they were made for.  Bringing it all together is my daughter, now a senior; as I prepare for her graduation I am drawn to pictures of her whole life, from the beginning, and am awestruck in the parallels between that beginning and the new beginning she is about to have as she goes off to college, and the new beginning I am going to have without seeing her messy, adorable, hilarious self every day.  I'm afraid, and I was afraid when she was born (what mother didn't at one point think, "Oh my goodness, they are letting me take her home with me!"), filled with some trepidation as to what I was going to do with her.  At 45 I am learning that my life is full of new beginnings all of the time, and I am blessed for each and every one, because I have grown stronger, healthier and more secure.  So, read or don't read; comment or don't comment;just promise me you will reflect on something that you maybe didn't see as a big deal in the beginning, but you now reflect and realize that actually it was, and look at how you have grown since then.  Peace xoxo.
http://writealm.com/january-prompt-a-day/